Vision Seeker: Tuning In (Day 2)

I openly admit to struggling with tuning in and centering my thoughts. Today's guided meditation was almost successful minus that moment where I realized I needed to shut down InDesign for no apparent reason while listening to Nicole Piar's soft voice. Despite this, I finished the meditation quite relaxed and had a chance to open an close the mediation using my singing bowl. I LOVE using my bowl. I've even determined it's a great method of cleansing when you don't want to use smoke or fluids. However that's a topic for another day.

Following the guided mediation, I gently shuffled my Shadowscapes deck to find an answer to the following questions:

• What aspects of myself want to come forward?
• What elements want to express themselves?

Emerging Aspects

For aspects of myself wanting to come forward, I drew The Fool. In most aspects of my life, I find myself embodying more of The Magician, and quite frankly that gets boring. All of the study and adventure and struggle to grow is mostly over. I need a new challenge, and one that satisfies all aspects of myself--the practical and the creative.

Elements to Express

The 6 of Pentacles reversed certainly doesn't bode well for this shopping addict. Sometimes I can be a bit too generous with my money and find myself in situations that are rather uncomfortable. In fact, I'm currently trying to curb my expenses to ensure I have all the money I need to purchase a new home in the very near future.

What does it all mean?

I'm bored and I'm craving new things in my life - so much so that I'm ready to jump blindly off of a cliff into the financial unknown. I expect to be able to get a loan, and afford it, but the reversed 6 indicates my expectations might be too high. 

As it all relates to my guide card of the 8 of swords, it seems that desperation to escape my binds is manifesting in a desire to distract myself and try anything I can. Anything that isn't actually working toward moving on. I'm diving headfirst into mad sprees of house shopping, but not throwing myself into the more grounded work I probably should be. In order to address this emerging aspect of myself, I need to take a moment to step back from the situation and truly think through if my actions are aligned with my personal goals. 

It's quite likely they are not, and the driving force behind it should be dressed more directly than the symptoms of boredom.